She'll Have It Differently

Time Travel: 20 Years from Now.

I’ll be 49 years old – almost 50, I suppose and Paige will be 23 years old. If all goes as planned, I’ll probably be living in – heck, what plan?! -- In truth, I envy people who has their life all planned out.

“Oh, I’ll have a mansion by the time I’m 35.”
“Oh, I’ll be in Australia in 2 years time.”
“Oh, I’ll probably be dead by then.”

I don't have a plan. It's so sad. I know.

I know though that I’ll probably be less energetic. I’ll probably be more cynical. I’ll probably have diabetes and hypertension (god forbid!). I’ll probably suffer from arthritis. I’ll probably have all three.

But I’ll be a different mom.

For instance, I’ll probably have Paige’s blog in my blog roll list. I’ll probably be friends with her on Facebook as well! She’ll probably think it’s weird that her mom keeps on commenting on her pictures.
“You look pretty here, baby!”
She’ll be begging me to stop embarrassing her.

I’ll probably know the top 10 songs in the Billboard charts, but I’ll be probably cringing every time Paige would shriek over Sean Preston Federline’s new song. I hope that she has more sense than that though.

I’ll probably give her the most horrible “birds and bees” lecture. I’ll probably give her a good lecture about taking responsibilities and making the right choices. I’ll also probably tell her, “Sex is overrated. If you really have to do it, use a condom.” The truth is, she will make her own choices. I can only do so much. And I want her to make her own choices. I want her make her own mistakes and learn from them.

I’ll probably tell Paige that her tattoo is really nice. I’ll probably even ask her, "Where I can get mine done?"

I’ll probably encourage her to go to this online university because “I’ve heard that it’s really damn nice.” And yes, I’ll say damn too.

Yes, she'll have it differently. I wish though that I can bottle up what I have had while growing up -
Playing with snails, butterflies and crickets
The Carpenters
Archie comics and Sweet Valley Kids
“Fix your room!”
“P20?! That’s all?! This is my COLLEGE allowance, right?”
Walking home after school with a good friend talking about boys.
Sleepovers and giggles.
"Does he like me?"
Courtship.
Love letters. Not emails or texts.
Waking up at 7 am to go to PE class.
Going to dances in stupid dresses.

All these things…

I want her to go through all that. Her generation will have it differently. I just hope that she will enjoy the same things that I enjoyed while growing up.