Jan 21, 2011

2011 First Entry: Being Sentimental

It's 3 in the morning. It's foggy outside. Go figure. Sometimes, I feel like my life is exactly like that - foggy. Half of the time, I am not sure if I am doing the right thing...pursuing the right thing. Sometimes, I feel like I am doing impossible leaps of faith. Yes, that's redundant.

Anyway, I just took a bath - yes, at 3 in the morning. Looking out of the window though, I noticed that it's a bright night, albeit foggy. The romantic in me kicked in. I love foggy nights. I love foggy mornings.

I wanted to write something sensible, but I guess I'm - once again - rambling. It has been a while since I wrote anything sensible or even remotely funny. Truth be told, a lot of things have happened, but I seemed to have lost my penchant for blogging. Sometimes, I think I was only blogging because of him.

I guess it was my way of telling him my story...It was my way of telling him what was happening to me.

After all these years.

Oh, well. I'm finally cured of that affliction now (or so I tell myself). The medicine came in a handsome package - one with a cute butt. :)

Lately, I have been reading status updates in Facebook, stuffs like, "Why do I still miss you after all these years?" OR updates like, "I have forgotten how you smell like...finally." OR something like, "I am almost over you..."

I realized this is a redundant story. Nobody has monopoly over this type of story. It's sad though. Sometimes, I find myself irritated with these kinds of updates. I find myself almost tempted to leave a nasty comment like, "Oh, get over it! Go bury yourself and spare us the crap!" or something even nastier.

But I can't.

You see, I was one of them. Ironically, I was hurt like hell, but it was difficult to let go. I guess it's always hard to let go of a good thing. On the other hand, it's always easy to let go of a crappy relationship and an ass of a boyfriend.

The other night, my friend texted me. She was crying over her boyfriend who broke up with her for the nth time. It has practically became a hobby between them to break up every now and then. It's hard to sympathize when you know for a fact that fairly soon enough they'd be back in each other's arms. Some people are lucky like that.

Don't get me wrong though. I am happy - and no, I am not convincing myself of that. I am. I am just so tired all the time. I just received a back massage from E, so I am a bit relaxed right now and sentimental. Did I say back massage? Oh yes, that's his way of helping me relax after a stressful day. I am just lucky like that. :)

But who's the guy I was blogging for?

Well, that's for me to know and for you to just wonder about. :))


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