Dec 16, 2011

Bullshit and Blessings

Nice title, huh?

I am having a good morning as opposed to the kind of morning I had yesterday. Yesterday was crappy.  I guess my good morning is partly because of the rain. I love the rain and I think I have blogged about how much I love the rain that I should just create a category for it or change my blog title to "Have I Told You How Much I Love the Rain Because I Love the Rain. Oh Yes, I Do! Yes, I Do! So, Have I Told You How Much I Love the Rain?"  Yes, that long.

Well, anyway, my good mood is partly because of the rain and my salary raise. :)

Well, that's basically it.  That covers the "Blessings" part in the title of this post.  Now, let's go to the Bullshit part.

You see, I have this little issue that I can't seem to recover from.  You know how we talk about people behind their backs? I mean, you know, we gossip about them. C'mon, don't tell me you haven't done this?! Who are you freaking Mother Teresa?! The Pope?!

Anyway, we've all done this. We do this to family, to friends, to colleagues, to strangers.  We do this with or without malice.  We stab them behind their backs or we deluge them with praises. It doesn't matter.  We, by nature, talk about other people.  And accordingly, people talk about us.  That's just how it is. It's the brutal nature of society.  I guess, we've all accepted that.  What is hard to deal with, however, is learning what people think of us or what they say about us when our backs are turned.  It is even harder when these are the people we consider our friends, best friends even.

Yesterday, a friend of mine sent me a text message she was supposed to send to someone else.  The message was about me.  She was not planning to assassinate me.  She was not assailing my character to little pieces.  In fact, there was some truth to what she was saying, but it was how she said it that hurt me - a lot. It was the words she chose to use.  It came as a shock.  It reeked of cowardice.  I realized I am not as mad as much as I am hurt.  She could have just told me right?

The thing is I don't mince words. I tell people what I think when I feel I have to. In a way, I think it's my way of making up for saying things behind their back (because yes, I do that, sue me.) Because of this, I feel that people should be honest about their feelings too. Anyway, in this case, she sent the bomb and it went off. Did she apologize?  Yes, she did.  She said that she was "sowee."

So, there goes the bullshit. 




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