The Tooth Fairy

 

Paige lost another teeth.  And yes, we've been doing the whole Tooth Fairy routine.  Maybe someday, Paige will read my blog, so here we go, "Yes, baby, there is no Tooth Fairy. It was all just your crazy mother who has this insane need to create a bubble world for you where everything is sugar and spice, sweet and nice."

Why do I do that? Why?! Why?!

Read More

Don't Grow Up...Just Yet

Read More

The Crush Saga

I thought Paige's crush ended when she learned that her "crush" doesn't like her anymore. I was really happy about that. I rejoiced too soon.

Last Saturday, after her Araw ng Wika, we went to McDonalds because she was invited to a birthday party.  After leaving her inside with their yaya, she suddenly came running outside the door and rushed outside the food joint.  Seeing that she was upset, I asked her what happened and she informed me that Zack looked at her sharply, so she didn't want to attend the party anymore.

She was really upset about the whole thing.  I nagged her a little to still attend the party, but she wouldn't budge, so I dropped it. I forgot about the incident until the other day.

Read More

Her First Crush

I was fixing Riley's hair and wasn't paying attention to Paige.  She was going on and on about something she wanted to tell me.  It was a little bit irritating, truth be told.  Finally, Riley's little tuft of hair was fixed, so I turned to Paige and said, "Okay, now tell me. What is it?"

She smiled and said, "Mama, may crush daw ako kay Zack."

She was smiling sheepishly, shyly...

And I knew then that that was a big moment... a huge one. A freakingly huge one.  I didn't want to screw it up, so I pasted a huge smile on my face.  And I prompted her to tell me more, "Crush ka man ni Zack bi?"

She's 6 years old and she's in second grade!  And I didn't know what to say.  I didn't know how to handle it, but I knew that I SHOULD NOT FREAK OUT. So, I didn't.  I prayed that the smile wouldn't slip from my face.  Inside, however, I was screaming, "OH MY GOD! She's my baby!!!"  But then I thought, "What the heck. It's not like she's telling me she fornicated, was impregnated by some trucker and she's running off to get married. So, I took it all in a stride and dropped down on my knees and proceeded to ask her about Zack. I've always known she has a teeny weeny crush on the boy because she keeps talking about him - all the time.  But I didn't know that she understood what that meant.  Apparently, she does now.  And apparently, that boy has a crush on her too.  Paige proceeded to tell me he tells her he loves her everyday!  So, there goes another litany of "Oh My Gods" in my head.

But I think I handled it properly.  No teasing.  No freaking out.  She was happy.

End of story.

Uh.huh. Not yet.

Later this evening, we were skyping with her papa.  At one point, I said, "Paige, why don't you tell Papa what you told me earlier." 

She didn't want to.  This prompted Erbe's curiosity because he could see our daughter covering my mouth to prevent me from talking.  I was laughing.  Finally, she said, "Sige na daw."

So, I told him what she told me, "Paige told me that she has a crush on Zack."

He didn't understand at first, so I had to repeat the sentence a couple of times.

Silence.

And then he said, "Aaaaay! Bawal ka na dian magrani sa Zack na yan!"

Paige's face fell.

But Erbe was oblivious to it, he continued forbidding her to ever come near "that boy" again.  He threw in a couple of threats to the little boy's health, "Tiukon ko yan Zack na yan!"

It was so freaking funny. I told him that yes, the little boy likes Paige too.  This prompted another bout of forbidding and threats. It was so funny but apparently Paige didn't think so.  Her face was crestfallen.  It was so sad, so I shushed Erbe and told him that he was handling it very, very badly.  He sighed and then said, "haay. ika na lang ba ang bahala."

Freaking hilarious.  You'd think she's 16 and she has a serious relationship.  He even kept saying, "MU pa pati kamo!"

I was laughing like a lunatic.  God.

So, yeah, score 1 for mother.

and a ze-boo-hoo-ro for the father. :D

Read More

Doing Her Little Magic Trick

Read More

Blackout + Scourging Summer Heat

Summer of 2013.

Because we couldn't take the heat anymore after hours of being cooped up inside the house - bearing with the sweltering heat, the kids and I "chilled" on the rooftop. :)

 

Read More

P & R

I think having Riley around is forcing Paige to grow up.

I don't want her to grow up EVER.

But it's inevitable... a foregone conclusion like the fact that someday I'll grow old and wrinkly, and I'd probably spend my time worrying about bunions, warts and arthritis.  But that's life. C'est la vie.

Paige is a funny little girl. She's always been funny, and I like to talk to her because she makes me laugh.  She says the darnedest things that drive me to laughing fits.  I must say I just don't love my kid, I like her too. She likes making faces and doing all these silly things.  But she always was a baby... Her father used to carry her around before Riley was born.  Lately though, I see her growing up right before my eyes. It's like her childhood is going by so fast, I can barely hang on to her.

She likes to sing Riley to sleep. It's actually sweet...bittersweet. I used to sing Moon River to her to get her to sleep, and now she likes to sing her sister to sleep. Seriously, she stays with Riley, rubbing her forehead and gently tapping her baby sister's behind, singing Moon River until Riley falls asleep.

Why am I not doing it?

Oh, it's another story. One that deserves its own blog entry but to keep it short - I'm number 4 in Riley's list. First there's her Papa, then her grandmother, and then there's her ate, and then there's me. I don't like it. I don't like it one bit because I don't understand it. In fact, I feel stupid sometimes because I do cry about this miserable hierarchy of affection. But that's that. I read that this will change eventually, but that's that...for now.

There are a lot of things I'm learning about myself. It's like a continuous process of self-discovery.  Lately, I realized I am actually developing patience. I have to; otherwise, I'd probably commit bloody murder. Just go on a rampage. I am constantly between bickering siblings.  I don't know how many times I've heard the words, "Mama, o!" and "Siya man kaya!"  Yes, Riley can say those words now. She also loves to stick her tongue out, narrow her eyes to small sharp slits and shout, "Ay, pondo!" This prompts another round of scratching, biting, kicking until one of them cries. It's a vicious cycle that I will probably have to deal with...forever! Jesus H. Christ.

But anyway, that's life...and guess what, I am enjoying it.  

Read More

The Supermom

When you're a mom, you learn that you're expected to fix everything.  It doesn't matter what it is.  Your children see you as this "superwoman" who goes about life, making their lives easier, better, happier.  So, when your child asks you to fix a toy that her sister broke, then you damn well better fix the toy.

It's not optional.

So, that's what I did. I tried fixing the damn bike. I grabbed the Epoxy tubes and tried to glue the damn thing back together.  It took me two hours, but the broken parts just wouldn't stick together. I tried stringing them together. It took me half an hour to realize it was impossible. I tried for more than two hours - all the while, cursing at the damn thing. I couldn't even scold Riley who broke the toy.  And Paige sniffling and crying drove me nuts.  I wanted to cry myself. So, I put down the toy, called up Erbe and spent a couple of minutes ranting.  When I felt a little better, I went back to fixing the damn thing.

But after two hours, I gave up. I thought that was the end of it. I made a mental note to buy a toy for Paige the next day.

And the kids and I went to sleep.

The next day, Paige opened her eyes and asked if her toy is fixed already. It's like she expected me to stay up the night until I fixed the toy. I didn't want to disappoint her, but honestly, I just can't fix it.

Frustrated, I grabbed the toy, grabbed the scotch tape and scotch taped the hell out of the damn thing - and voila! It's fixed!  Paige didn't mind the ugly tape. She was so happy that she could play with it again.  And I was happy that I was, once again, her supermom.

She believes I have powers, you see.  It's because she thinks my kiss can cure any ache and pain.

I'll let you in a little secret... it does.

Read More

Paige's Graduation Number

Read More

My Little Girl Has a Crush

Paige has seemingly developed a crush for this little boy in our neighborhood. As her mother, I would have probably just shrugged it off IF the boy were even remotely adorable, but he's not. And that is the understatement of the year. The poor little boy has not seen a bucket of water in days!  He's dirty.  He's often walking barefoot and he is always, always buck naked! Yep, his little twiggy is wagging for all the world to see.  So, you can just imagine our reaction when we heard Paige's neighborhood bestfriend telling the little boy, "I love you daa sabi ni Paige."

I was amused and a little dismayed, but Erbe's reaction was hilarious!  He started critizing our little girl's crush.  Which prompted Paige to declare, "Di dai na lugod ako ma-boyfriend!"  Erbe retorted back, "Kung ito man lang talaga iboyboyfriend mo, talagang dai na!Dai man lamang karakarigos!" I found the whole exchange hilarious. But my little girl was devastated not to have the support of her Papa.

Just look at Paige's reaction.

The other day, I was calling Paige and she said, "May kakaulayun ako mama." Kakaulayun. The word is amusing which got me curious, "Sisay kakaulayun mo?"  She didn't answer.  Bek, however, was standing next to her and she told me, "Hinahalat baga ate katong crush niya dian sa luwas." This enraged Paige who started crying and screaming.

I had to bite my lips to keep myself from laughing. And I called her for a fairly short conversation about crushes and naked boys. :)

Read More

SM Time

because this is my blog�

View Full Album

Read More

Say It Again and Again!

One thing I've learned about being a mother is that shouting doesn't work.  Often, Paige would cower, simper and cry when I fail to control my temper and end up shouting at her for something she did.  Over the years, I've learned other disciplinary tactics.

For instance, when Paige pretends she can't hear me, forcing me to shout her name over and over again before she'd respond, I would usually ask her to cover her ears.  She'd stay like that until I am well satisfied that she gets my point.  So, she'd walk around the house, with her hands covering her ears.  It usually lasts for several minutes.  Usually, however, I observe the "a minute for every year" rule.

Yesterday, Paige and I were talking and she kept inserting the word "udo" in her sentences.  It doesn't matter if she makes sense.  She'd just keep saying "udo".  So, I corrected her, asked her to stop using the word.  I thought she understood me until I asked her to ask their yaya to iron her uniform.  Off she went and then I heard her repeat my request to Bek.  I failed to hear the yaya's answer but I heard Paige said, "ay brownout? Akala ko kaya UDO."

Gahd.

So, I promptly called her and asked her to sit on the bed.  I told her to say the word "udo" over and over again until she's so tired of saying it, she wouldn't say it again. So, she started, "udo, udo, udo, udo, udo.."

In truth, it was amusing.  I had to turn my head, so she wouldn't see me smiling.  At that time, I was holding Riley who was asleep.  Eventually, Riley woke up.  And she saw Paige, sitting there muttering "udo, udo, udo, udo".

At this juncture, Paige's muttering has attained a certain rhythm.  I was still trying not to smile, but I was struggling.  Riley, however, didn't know her ate was being punished. She stood up and she started dancing to "udo, udo, udo"  Her head was bobbing, knees bending and hands clapping to the rhythm of "udo, udo, udo".

It was hilarious.  I burst out laughing and as you may well expect, Paige's punishment ended. Ah! the joys of motherhood! :)

Read More

The Things I Learned from Being a Mom

I am not your typical mom.  In fact, I am so atypical that I envy the normal ones, you know regular mothers.  I have my own way of doing things.  I think I frustrate Erbe who is so traditional in his views that he probably regrets marrying me.  I think he starts his prayers with, "Dear God, please help me reform my wife."


If you were married to me and you are quite traditional, you will regret it.  You see, I believe not all women are born with this overwhelming desire to clean the house, chop onions and grate cheese.

Okay, I know there are great pleasures they said you'd derive from "serving" your husband or your children.  One word comes to mind though every time I hear this chauvinistic statement - ARCHAIC.  Seriously?!  I'd probably do these things because I see them as:

1. Things I have to do because nobody else will do them

2. Things I want to do because it'll please my husband

However, #2 is negotiable.  It depends on how pleased I am with the husband as well.  If he's being an ass, should I still try to please His Majesty?

Read More

The Things a 4-Year-Old Should Know

Admit it, if you’re a mom – or a dad – you’ve probably compared your kid to somebody else’s kid. I should know, I’ve done the same thing hundreds of times! I, however, am not guilty of openly insulting or comparing my children with other people’s children. Since becoming a parent, I’ve noticed two things:
1. That parents want to believe that their children are little prodigies.
2. That parents often wonder what their child should know or should be able to do at certain ages.

I’m guilty of both.

I’ve realized, however, that there are really certain things that children, particularly preschoolers, should know. So, here is my list of things that a 4-year-old should know (my Paige is, after all, 4 years old):

First of all – and this is probably the most important thing in this list – your child should know that she is loved. Completely and unconditionally. No buts or what-ifs. No exceptions.

I've recently learned how important this is to my child.  Paige knows how happy I am every time she comes home with a star. I’ve learned, however, that a star didn’t matter much in comparison to my child’s happiness.

One afternoon, she came home, hiding her hand behind her.  She approached me with a sad look in her face. After I prompted her to tell me what’s wrong, she told me that she prayed dearly to Jesus, asking him to make her teacher stamped a star on her hand. And then she hesitantly showed me her hand and said sadly, “No star, mama.” I felt my heart breaking into tiny little pieces. I gave her a hug and told her that she’s a really smart and wonderful kid and that I love her no matter what.

It was an eye opener for me. I had a good talk with my husband after that because I was wondering where I draw the line. How do you encourage your child without causing her sorrow? And Erbe gave me a good answer, but then that’s another story.

Anyway, I continue with my list.

The second thing your child should know is this - how to keep herself safe. It is your duty to keep her safe, but there are basic rules that you need to teach your child. Never go with strangers anywhere. Never leave your side in public. Safety is a huge consideration especially when you have a little girl. Predators are everywhere! Boys are no longer safe as well.

She should know two important values: Respect and Honesty. Oh, children slip every now and then. Sometimes, your child would throw a tantrum. Sometimes, she’d lie – or god forbid if this happens to you – steal small potatoes from the supermarket (this happened to me - last week!), but as long as she’s going in the right direction, she’s going to be okay.

Your child should know that it’s okay to be silly. She should know that it’s okay to laugh and to use her imagination. Trees do not always need to have green leaves. Faces can be orange and violet. A bicycle can carry seven people. Let her have fun with her imagination. Her interests should be encouraged. She’ll soon learn the alphabet and numbers, but let her pretend to be a mermaid or a fairy for now. Let your child draw rocket ships, cars and airplanes if that’s what she wants.  
Finally, she should know that the world is wonderful and that it is magical. She should know that she is a very important piece of that magic. She should know that she’s so important that you would be willing to spend hours just playing with her or that she can come to you with her latest drawing of you (with an orange face, of course) and you'd be willing to give her a minute of your time.
Now, those things, my friends, are the things that a 4-year-old should know.

Read More

Online Storage :)

Read More

Minds That Matter

Jinx, I took this on the second day of classes. They were/are not required to use uniforms yet. :)

Read More

Paige on Boyfriends

I want to share this video of Paige. It'll make you laugh, giggle or at least smile, I promise. :)
Yes, she doesn't use "po". It's tragic. We forgot to use "po" around her while she's growing up, so she doesn't know how to use it. Anyway, never mind the po. Just watch the vid. Tinapay, I hope this makes you giggle.

Read More

Paige Made a Promise

And here's a video I'd probably enjoy showing to Paige for a long, long time.

Okay, I respect how parents prefer to rear their children, but I really don't understand why I'd have Paige speaking in English or Tagalog when she's living here and conversing with Bicolanos. I'd feel pretentious. Anyway, that's just me. What do I know, right?

So, here's the vid.  Forgive the quality. I was using my mobile phone and the light was poor.

Read More

Paige at the Hospital

Paige was diagnosed with encephalitis. We were told she's lucky that we were able to bring her to the hospital before her condition became irreversible. Initially, she had fever and stomachache. Eventually, she started complaining of headache and she started sleeping 24/7. We'd try to wake her up but she was only able to manage to stay up for 15 minutes tops and she'd go back to sleep.

Sussette put her on antibiotics but her condition didn't change. We went to see a GI doctor and we were told he didn't see anything wrong with her - or at least her condition wasn't something he could address. Sette told us that Paige may have encephalitis and she told us to see the neurologist. Dr. De Los Reyes immediately instructed us to have Paige confined and scheduled for CT scan and other series of neurological tests.

It was heartbreaking. Paige was screaming all the time. She was scared of the nurses and the needles and the antibiotics. She didn't want to have a CT scan so I had to stay with her inside the room. I got into an argument with the heartless bitch working the computers inside the EEG laboratory which Paige had to go through 3 times! I had to wash her hair three times for that because her scalp was supposed to be cleaned.

I had to comfort her while the neurologist tried a spinal tap procedure without anesthesia but Paige kept buckling, so she couldn't do it. The anesthesiologist who tried to do it failed too. Fortunately, Sette was there and she volunteered to do the procedure which she was able to do with only one attempt.

We had people helping us out, but I realized some things then:

1. That there are people who would visit us just because they are obligated to do so. I think they are hypocrites.  These are the people who came just so they can get over the whole thing and scratch it out from their To-Do list. 

2. There are people who truly cares. Curiously enough, these are people I didn't imagine caring.

3. Families - at the end of the day, they'd be the ones who'd be there for you. Of course, not everyone in your family can be counted on.  Erbe and I, once again, learned it the hard way.

Basically, I learned who I can trust to be there for me when life turns from crazy to shitty. Anyway, we stayed in the hospital for 8 days. Paige is very lucky to have people praying for her. She's doing great now. Still recovering, but doing a whole lot better.  Please God, keep her healthy so we'd never have to go back to the hospital again for her - or for Riley.

  

Read More

Dear God

I know you're busy and all.
And I don't pray often enough for you to hear me.
Life has been quite peaceful and
You've been very kind.
So, I've probably forgotten to say a prayer every now and then.
But now I beg of you,
Please listen to my prayer.
It's really quite simple, Lord.
Please heal my daughter.
That's all I ask.
She's in pain and as much as I want to cry along with her,
I can't.
I have to be strong for now.
But please just heal her.
Take away her pain.
I surrender her to you.

Read More