God, I'm so tired. I am not cut out for this. I've realized that I do not EVER want to be a businesswoman. Erbe revels on this however, but I hate it. I HATE IT. I hate waking up early and I hate sleeping late. I hate dealing with people and worrying, constantly worrying. The thing is Erbe loves this, but I end up with the ugly tasks, mostly scolding people. I don't know how many times I've scolded people the past few days. People have come to hate me. When I used to be "Tere", now I'm "Ma'am". See? That's how bad it is! They do not smile at me anymore. They try to avoid me. God.
Meanwhile, they like Erbe. My husband hates confrontation. He is generally one of the kindest souls in the planet. He doesn't speak ill of people. He likes to find the best in people. So, he hates confrontation and he hates scolding people and because I'm quite good at being the ultimate bitch, I do the dirty job. I hate it.
I wish Daddy will just get better soon. I am so fucking worried. I cried at the drop of a hat. I am so stressed out I've taken a bath three times today because bathing makes me feel good. I really need a break.
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