I grew up with these crazy fairy tales in my head that really made me expect and set impossible pictures of a prince who'd come in charging on a white horse and rescue me from the evil witch!
(Technically though, where do you get witches and castles nowadays?! Or a white horse for that matter? They cost shit of bucks!)
Bah! It's them friggin' princes who need rescuing! (No, my boyfriend did not piss me off.)
Anyways, my repertoire really is not on princes and how pathetically weak they really are!
It is more of how politically incorrect fairy tales are.
For instance, let's take that friggin thief Jack who climb up the beanstalk.. Who the hell made him a hero? What did he do? He is a bloody criminal! He took the friggin harp and the goose from the giant! And was he contented with just being a mere thief?
No!!! He went ahead and murder the poor giant!
A thought: I wonder why the giant in this story was so particular with the English man?? "Fi fie foe! I smell the blood of an englishman.." why not spanish? american? chinese?
Then there is Cinderella? that freaking sleeping beauty? and Snow White? The story always goes like this.. "There was a beautiful girl..."
Can they be for once, just bloody once, be freaking ordinary?!?!?! I know u'd argue that i am being too literal right? well, who do u tell these stories to? KIDS?!? Have u ever heard of anyone under 7 year of age writing a dissertation on these fairy tales?! nope.. let's leave the kids thinking that only beautiful girls win the bloody wimpy princes..Geeze!
Why can't Cinderella meet the Prince while she was cleaning the bloody fireplace with soots on her face?
And then there is that princess and the pea story... do u really have to feel a bloody pea beneath layers and mounds of blankets before u could actually marry a friggin prince?! geeze!
Well, there are a lot of stories that would make you raise your eyebrows...
Fairy tales, bah!
They should have written a fairy tale for lesbians and gays, I say!
