Humor Through Grief

Walking home after our last class, my friends from law school and I noticed the reflections from the searchlight darting here and there across the blackened sky.

As usual, my friends couldn't resist blurting out a wisecrack, and so Bumble said, "Hinahanap na naman ni Batman ang brief nia."

That made us laugh, but searchlights do not remind of Batman or his briefs. It actually reminds me of my Inay's wake.

It was August 2003. I was going through a major heartbreak - but of course, that's another story.

Anyway, Inay (my lola) passed away from pneumonia and I was heartbroken. We were in Cabusao for a one-week long wake - and sleeping was difficult with many people coming and going.

Mama was popping Valium like they were M&M's and she was walking around like a freaking zombie. Old ladies kept singing this song about some mother dying. The song would of course trigger sniffles or all-out hysteria. This pissed off one of my uncles who figured people would stop crying if the old biddies would just stop singing the darn song.

Anyway, I was afraid to go to sleep, but this one night I was able to. It was one of those nights.. The room where I was sleeping was quiet, but downstairs, I could hear people coming in and out of the house.

The peace was disturbed by this sudden commotion which also broke through my stupor. Suddenly, Mommy came into the room exclaiming, "Ne! May aswang sa luwas! Kasubago pa sigeng layug!"

At first I didn't want to open my eyes. I was so goddamn sleepy. But the word "aswang" broke through the haze and then I remembered that i left all the windows open. I imagined the freaking aswang ripping my head off my body (gruesome, I know), but the image had me scrambling out of the bed and running downstairs.

Nobody was inside the house. Everyone was outside, looking up the sky. So, I figured, what the heck - why not check out what's causing all the excitement.

People were pointing at the sky. My aunts and uncles (all educated if I may say so) were also looking up and giving out their opinions as to what they were seeing.

At first, I couldn't see anything - and then I saw this white blur moving to and fro. Everybody was so excited about it. I could hear all sorts of gossips - "Nagtugpa na daa yan sa atup nina Tata Kano. Maduguan daa yan tapos mayo na daang hawak. Manananggal daa yan."

The image was gruesome. I shuddered just thinking about it. Again, I looked up and shivered at the thought of the manananggal swooping in from the sky and eating me.

I heard one of my aunts saying matter-of-factly, "Dai yan aswang. UFO yan." Huh?!

After about 5 minutes of staring at the sky, I noticed that the blur of light does not seem to pose as a threat at all. After 10 minutes, I became so bored, I decided to go inside.

After a while, my mother came in looking for flashlight, "Ne, nahiling mo si flashlight? Nagduman si aswang sa plaza. Maduruman kami ta gagadanun daa."

My response was a huge sigh. I still didn't know what the white blurred light was, but i was pretty sure it wasn't an aswang.

Anyway, they weren't not able to kill "the aswang" because the light didn't move away from the spot. It didn't sweep down and there were no reports of anyone being eaten alive.

The next day, two of my cousins and I went to Naga to get some burial stuffs. We weren't able to come home the same day, so we decided to spend the night here.

That night, my cousin and I decided to eat out. Nobody wanted to cook and we figured eating at Biggs would be more convenient. Walking home, my cousin (who hasn't gone to Cabusao yet for the wake) looked up and saw the reflections of a searchlight darting here and there.

"Okay man ang Chili Peppers ah. Nag-aattract na naman customers."

I looked up and saw the white light reflected across the blackened sky. It was only then that I realized what that freaking aswang really was - an effing searchlight.

I started laughing. Classic.