Morning Rant

Time: 6:52 AM

Wet and irritated. It's definitely not a very good morning for me. Oh, it started out right. I woke up at 1 in the morning, watched YouTube vids of PBBDU (I snore my way through the nomination night) and worked. By 5:30, my stomach started grumbling - and so I started nagging Erbe to wake up. I wanted to go to Jollibee, but he wouldn't budge.

Hmp, I thought. Huffing, I get dressed and went on my not-so-merry-way, all the while, cursing Erbe for not getting up and for having the temerity to brave my wrath in exchange for his sleep (I know, I'm an awful-awful wife).

Walking alone is not that fun. My Bridge didn't even cheer me up. It wasn't a leisurely walk. It was a horrible walk especially when it started raining! Oh, I eventually reached Jollibee and I was pleased that the security guard didn't even bat an eyelash when I entered the restaurant, dripping wet. People glanced and stared surreptitiously at me though. I looked like a bedraggled cat. I took my sweet time eating breakfast; albeit, I was practically chilled to my bones. The hot coffee helped a little.

Anyway, I bought pancakes for Paige, nothing for Erbe. I blame this horrible morning on him. He's all to blame, I don't care how unreasonable that sounds. Yes, I blame him for the rain too!

Lucky for Jollibee, he wasn't there. Else, I'd kicked his butt once again. :)

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Glee Sweet Caroline

I just can't stop singing this song!
It's a feel-good music. I love Puck's cover. It'll have you swaying and singing along in no time.
Oh, sweet Caroline!
pap-pap-pap.

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Taking a Walk with Erbe in the Morning

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Addicted to PBB Double Up

I am effing addicted to Big Brother Double Up. It's embarrassing! Here's how I know I'm effing hooked to the friggin' show.

1. I set my alarm clock to wake me up every night in time for PBB.

2. I steal from Erbe's load just so I'd be able to vote for House A nominees.

3. "Ba? Pirang beses ka nagboto? Grabe baga bawas sa load ko?"

4. I immediately call up Cheryl after every primetime episode to discuss with her the night's episode, curse at Mariel and Yuri, utter a few blasphemes and declare my devotion to Melissa and Jason. (Yes, it's effing sad.)

5. I spend hours reading people's comments on Facebook and Twitter. I watch videos after videos of PBB 24/7 clips in Youtube.

6. I watch PBB Uplate, leave comments on Facebook and cross my fingers hoping Bianca would read my comments. (Insert insults about this here)

7. I spend precious seconds (a minute or so tops) crying over Melissa and Jason's separation.

8. I genuinely think that PBB is the highlight of my everyday life.

9. I blog about my addiction.

10. I don't care about what you think about my addiction.

Care to shoot me now? *sigh*

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Is There Really Something about Mary?

My best friend is heartless.
She breaks hearts and she doesn’t look back.

Kidding!

In truth, my bestfriend is far from being cruel or heartless. She actually has a very good heart. I can honestly say that I haven’t met someone as kindhearted as she is. That is, of course, until I’ve met my husband. Anyway, Tin has a pure soul – and that’s the problem.

This is why she has left broken hearts in her wake and many of these people have never recovered. Just ask a couple of exes who still keeps a picture of her in their wallet – or their mobile phone.

I chatted with one of her ex last night. They are drawn to me. I think that by being friends with me, they somehow feel closer to her. The narcissistic side of me thinks that they just find me extremely adorable. OK, I gagged a little after saying that.

Anyway, I got the long drawn-out speech about how he has not gotten over her – the same speech that I have heard before. This is a speech from her exes. Don’t even get me started on her stalkers’ speech. Those kinds of speeches are just way too weird for words. You promptly would want to shoot yourself in the head just so you’d be able to spare yourself the horrifying trauma. Yes, her stalkers are also drawn to me. It’s creepy I know.

Anyway, all the long drawn-out speeches led me to this one question, “Why haven’t they gotten over her?” To stretch the truth a little bit, one would say that she has practically ruin their lives!

Seriously, they have difficulty finding good partners. They keep comparing all their present and future partners to her and everyone fails to measure up.

I’m friends with a couple of them who are almost in their 30’s, still hanged-up on her, still finding the ONE. Meanwhile, Tin is getting married this August.

The ironic thing about this is that they all broke her heart. She was never the one at fault.

So, why haven’t they gotten over her? Ding! Ding! Ding!

The answer is really simple – because they had the best, but they screwed up and let her go. When you had the best, what - or who - else is there left?

Oh, I’m not exaggerating. Yes, she’s not perfect. I’d know after all I’ve been friends with her for more than a decade. But I’ve often said that if I possess the XY chromosomes, I’d probably be stalking her as well. Heck! She can turn gays to guys! I

But it’s not just because she’s pretty; although she is. It’s not just because she’s smart. because she is It’s not even because she has a pure heart. It’s ACTUALLY because she has all these things. On top of that, she wouldn’t bat an eyelash if you ask her to eat at a dingy turo-turo with you. She’d just flopped down and she’d heartily gobble down kinalas and baduya right along with you.

And that’s how she got them and that's why they can't forget.

So, what else is there left to say? Except that I’ll be damned –there really is something about Mary.


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On a different note: If you're single and still looking for Mr. Right or Wrong - depends on what you prefer - here's a really interesting post. CLICK!

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Meddling with Tinay's Love Life

To be honest, I didn’t notice her at first; although it was already obvious that she has the brains of Einstein right from the start. Right off the bat, that’s the first thing one would notice about her. Anyway, it was only after she began arguing with our trainer that I finally noticed her. She is opinionated and intelligent – and she knows her English grammar. In fact, she aced the damn thing.

How did we become friends?

I took pity on her.

Seriously! I thought she was this weirdo who absolutely had no friends – zero, nada, zinch! And I, with my generous – though misguided – heart decided to take her under my wings – or rather, my several inches long arms. I was genuinely surprised when I found out later that she had a bunch of friends! Yes, you read that right, GENUINELY surprised. I really, really thought she had NO friends. :)

Anyway, ever since I can remember, I have been meddling with her love life. I remember waking up at ungodly hour just so I can buy her suitor flowers. I even arranged the bouquet myself. He couldn’t come to the market and my house is nearer. I was as devastated as her suitor was when she barely gave the bouquet a glance. She literally threw the damn thing when she got it. Yeah, she’s sorry now, but she broke MY HEART! It was a pretty bouquet, damn it!

One time, she was mooning over this guy. My solution was to coerce her to buy a P10,000 SE phone! Just like that! I can’t remember now why I made her buy that much expensive phone without any regard to her savings. It just happened. One minute, we were talking about her love life, the next minute, I was dragging her to Tancel’s.

Anyway, here I am again, meddling. I am actually just posting these pictures because I am showing this to someone. Well, you can sue me now, but you’ll thank me later if he turns out to be THE ONE. If he’s not, well, we can get another phone, right? How's your savings?

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To Whom It May Concern

Cruelty is a lovely, lovely thing –
Because it frees you from the lies and wishes that will never come to pass.
I don’t know how I can make it any easier.
Perhaps, it’d be easier to understand if I would explain.
You see, I believe that when he was five, God created me - for him.
I have always been meant for him.
I have told him so many, many times.
I have shared my heart to many, but my soul to only one.
In my quiet solitude, I know this.
He knows it too.
You see, it does not matter what I say
Or do.
It does not matter how the world will interpret my words or actions.
It does not matter how you perceive them.
At the end of the day, I am his.
And he is mine.
True love they say remains after the fireworks.
It’s what is left after a Home Run.
It’s what is left after the Orchestra retires every piece of instrument.
True love is forged by fire.
It is what is left after weeks of storms and days of darkness.
Those who know our story…who knows us understand this.
We have been through hell and we survived it.
Because after everything, we have each other -
and the love, oh the love that was always meant to be.

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Internet ENNUI

I'm tired of Facebook...
and blogging..
and some people... yes, including you.
I'm tired of giving people a glimpse of my life, well, except for you, Tinay and Jinkydoodle because I have fun reading about your lives too.
I'm tired of giving people access to my thoughts.
I'm on a blogging ennui.

I'm giving them all a rest - well, except for my Facebook games. :)

Don't worry Tinay and Jinx, I'd still be visiting your blogs and will leave INAPPROPRIATE comments.

For now, I'm going on a blogging leave. I will basically disappear from the online world for a while. It can really screw up your life. It will bring back old ghosts and screw up your life altogether. One minute you're doing fine, the next minute you'd have some loony emailing you blasphemies. One minute you're doing great, the next minute you'd have people screwing up with your emotions because they're back. I also hate the thought that I'd have to edit my blog entries just so I won't offend people's feelings and sensibilities.

Oh well, this too shall pass.

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When I Look at You

love, love, love this song...

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Embarrassing Confession

I wish I'd see Jericho Rosales before I die.

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Dear Tinay

Please do not complain about him calling at 6 a.m.
He calls me at 3 in the effing morning!
It doesn't matter if he thinks I'm still awake - you do not call people at 3 o'clock in the morning unless it's a matter of life and death.
You still got the longer stick. :)
But you're right, he's a nice guy, so yeah, we can forgive him for his weird idiosyncrasies.

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I'll Be Damned

What if things turn out differently?
Who would have thought that things will end here?
Who would have thought indeed.
I am flattered.
Deeply flattered - and yes, thankful as well.
Still, it doesn't change things.
Those words are seven years too late.
Life has thrown me too many curve balls.
Like I said before, fate is laughing its ass off at my expense.
And right now, I think it's doubling over in hysterical laughter.
Closure be damned.

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Rambling at 2:08 AM

• Listening to Kelly Clarkson's Already Gone. It's a good song - definitely one of those songs that you can relate to. Well, I can relate to it.
  

• Is vastly irritated with some of Facebook's updates. No, Tinay, your updates amuse me and entertain me. It's the lovey-dovey updates that make me want to barf my intestines out. Not a pretty picture, huh? You'd feel the same too if these people were in your list. That's not too bad - you're probably thinking. Well, try reading "I love you so much" and "I miss you so so so so much" posts several times a day - and on a daily basis! It's not that bad? Oh, okay, I must be menopausal or just having my PMS. :)


• PMS? I hope! Ssshh... I'm letting you in a secret, Paige may be having a brother or sister soon.. Oh, okay. I'm not sure yet. I haven't checked.

• I saw the Big Brother Housemates eating balot. Can you imagine eating 30 of those blasted almost-ready-to-fly ducklings in one sitting? It wasn't pretty. I swore off balot for the rest of my life. When I was dying - yes, dying (I'm not exaggerating) from internal bleeding due to dengue, my aunt forced me to eat 30 balots. She thought it'd help my platelet count or something. They didn't. So, anyway, no balot for me for the rest of my life.

• I have realized that my personal ghost has not left me yet. Darn it. Now, what to do? What to do?

• I have a new secret. I'm a blabbermouth but I'm very good at extricating secrets from people. Anyway, I have a new one. It's pretty juicy too. I have drawn a picture of it. I won't explain though.

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Kris

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Mobile Blogging

I'm blogging on my phone. This is nice. I should have done this before.

I'm missing my journal. I'm worried about someone and writing would have helped me. I should get a new journal.

Oh, that reminds me,you've been promising gifts, why don't you get me a new journal on your next trip??? That would be nice.

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Sex and Marriage

Earlier this evening, my sister called me up to check up on us. Eventually, we got around to talking about marriage and intimacy, my sister was telling me about her opinion about sex and marriage.

At some point, I said, "Siguro talaga sa kadaklan na mag-agum nene arug naman talaga kayan. Nababawasan naman lang talaga ang intimacy o sex kasi nga garo na lang sinda mag-tugang."

Did she leave it at that? Of course not. She wouldn't be Kris if she did, she continued on, insisting that there should still be sex regardless of how the couples treat each other and out of the blue she said, "Garo man lang yan ate sex between sa mag-tugang!"

Huh?
Yep, she said that.

After digesting what she said, I burst out laughing. Freaking classic statement. Perverted, twisted and incestuous, but classic.

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Postsecret

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Writer's Block

I think it does not come as a surprise to many people that I am actually working as a writer. The good thing about this is that I am actually getting paid for writing. This was not the case before. Nowadays, even my aunts offer to pay me for whatever they would like me to write. Even my own father considers paying me for writing! Well, he considers. He does not actually pay.

Anyway, I grew up writing stuffs for people. I remember writing Kuya Victor's love letters when I was in 5th grade and he was courting our neighbor.

I remember writing Bobet's love letters including those he gave to his now-wife Michelle. And I cannot imagine how I manage to write love letters for Mark, Khristine's husband - I was writing them for her.

One of the weirdest - and perhaps toughest - requests I have ever received is a Eulogy. I was supposed to write it for Candice, a former classmate who died brutally several years back. I was supposed to write the eulogy for Candice's friend. Both of them were my classmates in High School.

I didn't know what to write. Candice was a sweet girl, but we weren't closed. She was a classmate, but I barely exchanged words with her. The last time I saw her, I was taken aback by how pretty she looked. She really grew into herself. She seemed really glad to see me and so we exchanged a few hello's. Needless to say, I was shocked when I saw her face being flashed on the television as a rape and slay victim. I hope whoever did it rots to hell for all eternity!

Anyway, after being requested to write her eulogy, I didn't really know what to say. And so I thought, "What would I write if Tin dies?" At that time, Khristine was my constant companion. And so, I got busy writing Tin's eulogy. God forbid. Well, at least it was initially inspired by her. Ultimately though, I wrote it for Candice.

Needless to say, the eulogy was good (modesty aside). It had the whole class crying. The eulogy, however, had Tin frowning. She did actually frowned her way throughout the reading. Her expression almost had me in giggling fits.

After the mass, she said, "Well, at least I know now what you would say if I die."

Yeah, I know, this story is a bit creepy especially if you know Candice, right Jinx?

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Lost: 500 Hundred Bucks

Mama borrowed five hundred bucks from me the other day. Later that evening, Paige approached her and said, "Papa hagad money."

Thinking that Erbe was asking for the five hundred bucks, she handed over the money to Paige. My daughter did not give the money, however, to her papa or to me. Instead, she went downstairs where everybody else in the house saw the money.

Later, Nana Viol saw her going upstairs clutching several hundred bills on her hand - and that was it. That was the last time anyone ever saw the money.

(Let's pause for a while to pay our respect to the five hundred pesos... :) yeah, corny.. shoot me now!)

Anyway, since I never received the money, Mommy was furious with herself for giving the money to Paige. For several days now, she has been asking Paige about the money trying to solve the big mystery.

"Baby, kisay mo tinao si money? Ki E-viol o ki Boboy?"
"Ki Boboy!"
"Ki Boboy o ki E-viol?"
"Ki E-viol!"

*sigh

She has never failed to give us really funny answers. We are actually having fun asking her just to see how absurd her answers will get.

This afternoon, while working, I could hear them talking outside of our room.

"Baby, kisay mo tinao si money? Ki E-viol o ki papa?
'Ki Papa!"
"Ki papa talaga?!"
"Iyo po."
I heard mama shouting, "Tere, yaon baga daa ki Erbe si kwarta."

Rolling my eyes, I went outside and asked, "Yaon baby ki papa si money?"
"Iyo po."
"Ows. Yaon ki papa o ki Santa Claus?"
"Ki Santa Claus!"
Turning to mama, "Ma, stop petitioning the court. Case dismissed."
"Ay karagaton ta kang aki ka, kisay mo baya tinao si kwarta?" Mama asked frustrated.
Paige promptly answered, "Ki Santa Claus!"

:)

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